One of my very first teachers, who I consider a beloved brother—Shane Perkins—taught me much about unconditional love and standing in your power.
He described “climbing up the pendulum” as being able to witness the big swinging movements of life from a place that is less extreme, just gently rocking rather than helplessly swinging from one side to the other. In other words, staying more centered.
So I’ve been practicing that. There have been a lot of emotions in the last few months and especially the last week, but I’m finding I’m less and less attached to the feelings and unconcerned with the outcome.
Somehow or another, in the words of the great Bob Marley, “Everything ‘gonna be alright.”
I just need to speak and live my truth right now.
Here’s why I feel the need to independently create yoga products:
My choice to leave Anusara Inc was primarily because I am in a hugely creative point in my life, with a book and several video products in the works, and I refuse to be creatively limited by or financially obligated to Anusara, Inc. Be assured there is a difference between the method of the yoga I teach, and the business that I have just stepped away from.
I think it’s important for me to explain WHY I’m choosing to make products, and thus concerned with the ownership, licensing, and royalty policies that were written into the licensing agreement I had to sign to become a certified Anusara yoga instructor.
I came up with this list, not just to tell you my reasons, but to be sure I myself am clear in my inner knowing.
1) I like teaching in my hometown of Kamloops, BC. I love my students. They really don’t like it when I leave them for extended periods of time.
2) At the same time, I want to travel, but I don’t necessarily have to teach when I travel as I would need to do to make the kind of money I want to make unless I make products. If I were to travel and teach for a living, I’d be away from my local community far more frequently than if I just go for the adventure of it and then come home refreshed to teach again.
3) Having books, videos, and other media in products helps me share what wisdom and skill I have to offer, and also live the lifestyle I want to live. Why shouldn’t I make good money helping people feel happier and more free? I’m talented and have valuable services and products to offer. We all have talents to share and the world benefits when we do so.
4) I want to be financially steady so I can take the time to actually become a mother. I don’t feel comfortable taking that leap until I have an income that is steady enough for me to cut my classes way back or not teach for a period of time if that’s what I need to do.
Since I’m self-employed, there’s no such thing as maternity leave. I have to provide for myself if I want to take the time off to nurture and grow another being.
By leaving Anusara, Inc., I release myself from limitations around the creation of yoga offerings that are the products of my heart, my experience, and wisdom I have gathered from innumerable sources.
By leaving Anusara, Inc., I am able to not only speak my truth, but to live it.
And, I want to make this very clear, I have not left Anusara yoga.
I have not turned my back on the kula or John Friend. I am holding space for healing, regrowth, and transformation. I step back to hold space and be who I choose to be.
I’ve climbed up the pendulum, witnessing the emotions that come but not entrenched in them—not thrown off center by the extremes.
I have made this choice from a place of compassion and love. And I send that compassion and love out, in ever expanding waves, into All That Is.
Lokah Samasta Sukhino Bhavantu